Insect in a beer mug !

An insect falls into a mug of beer...
Reactions:

Englishman: Throws his mug away and walks out

American:Takes the insect out and drinks the beer

Chinese: Eats the insect and throws the beer away

Japanese: Drinks the beer with insect as it is coming free

Indian:Sells the beer to the American and insect to the Chinese and gets two new
mugs of beer. ......INTELLIGENT INDIANS

Pakistani:-Accuses the Indian for throwing insect into his beer

-Relates the issue to Kashmir
-Asks the Chinese for Military aid
-Takes a loan from the American to buy one more mug of beer.

Where are all the British?

A   Somalian arrives in  London as a  new immigrant to the  UK .

He  stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says........

'Thank you Mr. British for letting me in this country, giving me housing, money for food, free medical care, free education and no taxes!'

The passer by says, 'You are mistaken, I am Mexican!'

The  man goes on and encounters another passer by. 'Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in the UK !'

The person says, 'I not British, I Polish!'

The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand  and says, 'Thank you for the wonderful  Britain !'

That person puts up his hand and says, 'I am from  Russia , I am not from Britain !'

He  finally sees a nice lady and asks, 'Are you a British?'

She says, 'No, I am  from Africa !'
Puzzled, he asks her, 

'Where are all the British?'
The African lady checks her watch and says ...

'Probably at work'

Normal Blonde.

A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease.

"Would you mind telling me, doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?"

"That's easy," he replied. "You ask them a simple question which everyone should be able to answer with no trouble. If they hesitate, that puts you on the right track."

"What sort of question would you ask, doctor?"

"Well, I might ask him... "Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?"

The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh - "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."